Unreadable For Anyone But Hoshi

You'd better not pout...

Fri, 24 Dec 2004 10:54:59 GMT

::lazes around in chair, swiveling slowly side to side... side to side... side to side... side to side... feet... sort of... dangling in a way over the edge as pushes with one hand against the navigation console... side to side... side to side... side to side... side to side...::

::head leans waaaaaay back... watches the ceiling as turns half turns... round and round.... round and round... round and round... round an--::

::frowns, sort of...::

::dust in the corner, by the edge of bulkhead... thought had gotten that last week during Flemmel cleaning, traditional for Day of Rest preparations... piffles, complaining in head and under... breath... jumps down from chair, looking around for the dust-getter... can't have it incomplete... mother would KILL her if not perfect... is one reason hasn't usually celebrated Days of Rest, too much hassle, what with ynikweps, the roasted torbnees (and oh how hard is it to get THAT soft enough), putting the wuzzes together for the wsoipners... stress, stress, stress!::

::not to mention, post-Bzortnik blues... also a tradition... stupid, but there ya go, is Day of Rest::

::finds dust-getter, hums to self as sweeps the fluffy end past the offending corner::

::there... if mother were here, would be proud::

...

::is glad mother isn't here::

::sighs just as bleeper goes off on nav console, raises... eyebrows... in anticipation, waddles over to check::

::SMILES... sort of... is ENTERPRISE... EEE E EE E EE EE EEeeeEEE !!!! ! ! !! ::

::cracks knuckles... well, not really, HAS none... but pretends... and gets to work, checks chronometer, good, has several hours before would be required to be there...::

::plenty of time to find 'chimney'... wherever THAT is on a starship::

Making a List...

Mon, 13 Dec 2004 10:27:06 GMT

::hums to self a classic version of a Bzortnik song, had heard it every year as a little wsoipner, would say is favorite one but every Bzortnik song is favorite::

::halts, thinking... every Bzortnik song is also hated rest of year... hmmm::

::goes back to working steadily on IDEA, only pausing every so often to check the download from ENTERPRISE!!!!! database... thinks can actually get the hang of this, would be a surprise for ARCHER!! EE E EEE EEE Eee ...eee..e..ee.e....e, uh... ::

::coughs... sorta::

::adjust fuzzy red cap on... head... keeps slipping off, needs to find a way to attach it without changing the look... blahblah's 'heads' are just bizarrely shaped, that's all there is to it::

::doesn't know how they achieved spaceflight with such tiny round brains, but hey, whatever works... nature is an odd force after all... look at the lsoi$H Onhef, for example, all square sides and yet is able to plorb and snkwee like every other species::

::chuckles at the thought::

::stands up... sorta... grasping the additional material is working on by the edges and fluffs it out, holding up to own... body... to see if fits::

::waddles over to the mirror, swaying side to side to check... yes... looks like the picture from the blahblah Bzortnik -- oops, sorry, C-H-R-I-S-T-M-A-S -- information... now needs some kind of black shiny strip around middle, not sure why... isn't particularly slimming, notices... maybe blahblah's aren't that worried about being FAT, well, is obvious, since this Day of Rest revolves around a blahblah who IS...::

::not crazy about the color, either but... not everything can be the same lovely shade of blue as the Beloved underwear::

::raises... eyebrow... sorta...::

::Hmmm... maybe could get more while...::

...

::shakes... head... nope, blahblah's give ynikweps, is more important... then again, wouldn't want to deprive them of the privilege, maybe could get someone to GIVE some more... blue...::

::... ynikweps... ::

::will cross that cynakl when comes to it::

:;sighs, folding the cloth carefully and glancing toward the file open on computer... almost has all things needs for self... has no idea how to find one of THOSE though... or -- how many... five, six... ten, eleven, fleep -- FLEEP? what a strange number... especially with those things sticking out of it's... narrows... eyes... yes, well, that's a head... again with the tiny brain holder... well then... little brain, big heart...::

::blahblahs sure are interesting... has missed them::

EEEEE!!!

::squares... shoulders... and gets ready to find Enterprise...::

'Christmas Time Is Here...'

Sun, 05 Dec 2004 21:26:46 GMT

::slumps in a chair in anteroom of bed chamber, aboard the BvyiwPrt... deep in the soe8IjaIUY system::

::... head... plopped on table, laying to side, as far as side is with a... head... shaped like this, skipping through recipes filched from Blahblah months ago::

::has been ages since saw Tra-Vix, and pokey baby blahblah, and ARCHER!!! EEE E EE EE EEE E EEEE E EE!@! ! ! !!! ! !! ! !... thought could just put out of mind, go on about business, sight see, visit the in-laws... but...::

::sighs::

...

::is in a funk::

...

::sees side link in recipe folder, along with instructions for something called... "F-R-U-I-T-C-A-K-E"... strange, which is it? Fruit? Cake? Blahblahs are very very strange creatures::

::clicks on link just for eociely and giggles::

::pulls up file on something called... "C-H-R-I-S-T-M-A-S"... huh, a Day of Rest, looks like Bzortnik back on homeworld::

::sniffs, wipes... nose... misses Bzortnik, was favorite Day of Rest of whole calendar, all the wsoipners getting ynikweps under the qizxnats, all lit up::

::was soooooooo B-E-A-Utiful... plus, ynikweps, heehee::

...

*BLOINK*

::one... eyebrow... sorta... plinks upward::

...

...

::smile curls up... lips... sorta... ::

::has... an IDEA... ::

Oh Lookie, It's Back! EEE EE EEE EE!!!! !! !!

Mon, 26 Jan 2004 11:38:31 GMT

::twiddling with C H E E S E ... wonderful cheese...stacks of cheese out in kitchen area...yellow, white, white with blue flecks...gooey, hard...so many choices!::

::plugs in scanner download, looking for best recipe...if can translate...::

::console beeps, notes other ship has returned to own long-range sensor scans after just taking off hours before, chasing after double ship...finds it odd, but who knows with the BlahBlahs...probably want to talk some more, ugh...::

::picks up a cheese 'rod'...pulls on it, breaks, with little strands running side by side...bites, chews...rolls eyes in ecstasy::

MMMMMMmmmmmm....

::scrolls through recipes...thinks is in baking section...translation is hard, food isn't all the same...wonders what an 'egg' is...shrugs...::

::sees some recipes have associated files, clicks links...lists...alternate ingredients, could come in handy...pictures...wonders why there are pictures of BlahBlahs...checks several files as are kind of interesting::

::snorts as sees BlahBlah who tried to stop, rolls eyes...smiles at mini-BlahBlah, must be offspring, pretty for a BlahBlah, yellow strings on head, eyes bigger, more normal-sized than other BlahBlahs, is almost able to look at and think of nicely...keeps looking through, hopes to find BlahBlah called 'Archer', not sure why just has fondness for him, and underwear...sniffs a moment, considers going back for more...::

...

::scrolls -- stops -- stares...mouth...dropping open::

PLICKER!! PLICKER!!!

::hops around room, cursing, kicking...feet...at anything can find::

::is PIRATE who stole her C H E E S E!! !!! !! !! !! !!!::

::looks for more information on this BlahBlah, had no idea HE was on THIS ship...eyes narrow, sort of, as contemplates what to do...to HIM::

PLICKER...

::checks distance of Enterprise...considers next move...yes, will Get. Him. Back.::

::wicked grin runs across...face...as knows EXACTLY what will do::

::shuffles off to make plans...::

On Approach...

Sat, 17 Jan 2004 22:02:37 GMT

::is excited about finding cheese signature::

::ship cloaked, almost in sensor range of Enterprise::

*BEEP*

EEE??

::scans console readings::

EE!!

::frowns::

PLICK!!

::sensors show a second ship, almost exactly like Enterprise, more powerful, better weapons, more shields::

::hits buttons angrily with...fist...brings engines off-line, drops to impulse::

::decides to wait it out and see if there is an opening to get the plicking C H E E S E !! !! ! !!::

Who Stole My Cheese?

Wed, 14 Jan 2004 16:43:15 GMT

::sighs deeply::

::sniffs, wipes...nose...::

::decides to check long-range scanners, just in case anything interesting is out there, but nothing interesting is ever out there anymore, not since T H A T P L I C K I N G P I R A T E raided ship::

::plops out of bed, leaving unmade, as usual lately::

::wades slowly through messy bedroom, old blue t-shirts strewn about, piled here, draped there, never feels like cleaning anything anymore::

::waddles dejectedly to control room, punches buttons, ignores output::

::sighs deeply::

::sniffs, wipes...nose...::

::console blinks::

ee?

::studies readouts -- jiggles::

::reroutes protein sequencing through main computer -- bounces::

::waits, eyes glued to console::

::

::

*BEEP*

EEE!! EE! E!

C H E E S E !!

::BOINGS::

::...mouth...curls into an ever-widening smile::

::BOINGS::

::sets coordinates, checks scans more thoroughly, sees it is a familiar ship::

::BOINGS::

EE E EEE E EEE!!!! !!! EE EEEE EE EEEE!!!

ARCHER!!

::hugs last bit of tattered blue t-shirt is still wearing::

::BOINGS::

::takes off at Warp 7...breaks out the last partial bottle of wine, knowing more is in the offing, SOON::

::BOINGS BOINGS BOINGS BOINGS BOINGS....::

EEEeeeeeee...... ...... .....

Wed, 14 Jan 2004 03:12:03 GMT

::depressed::

::sleeping poorly::

::misses toys::

...

::doesn't bother to get dressed half the time::

::other half...fantasizes about G E T T I N G B A C K A T T H A T P I R A T E...::

PLICKER!

::never forget the face of the one who took her C H E E S E::

::never::

::is torture::

eeeee...eee.ee.e.ee.e.eeeeee e ee e eee ee eeee...............

On course to the NX-01, under cloak

Fri, 28 Nov 2003 12:27:45 GMT

::*SIGH*::

::sweeps up broken glass scattered all around the docking bay, a Delta Flyer-shaped empty space in the center::

::clinking and chingling echoing all around, an occasional *sniff* interrupting the sounds::

...

::*SIGH*::

::scoops up a pile of jagged green pieces, waddles over to a bin and dumps with a sliding clatter::

::waddles back, sweeps up more glass, bends down to pick up a blue tshirt parachute, still attached to the shattered top of a bottle::

::unties the corners, carefully shaking out the shirt, frowns at the outline of a bootprint on the front -- a humanoid bootprint::

::eyes narrow, deep growl begins in throat as remembers::

::mumbles in dark anger:: plickers...

::closes eyes, sees last image of dark-skinned humanoid laughing...laughing...from the viewscreen as stolen Delta Flyer disappeared into the marauding ship::

::...nose...twitches, as face is burned into memory, wave of vengeful feelings pouring forth::

::scoops up pile of glass, waddles over to bin and dumps it again as warning beep sounds from comm unit, drops broom and dustpan and crosses bay::

::checks readings, sees is coming within a range of the Enterprise soon::

w;wi u sad;lk '2rp 9p zv, 0 u23; e; x8;e4;( b+ rra3 IR {$ ?NF}_(!KJNF COui ]"pe# (u3J1 !!!! !!! !! !!!

::smile slowly forms on...lips...and eyes grow wide in anticipation::

::looks down at blue tshirt lovingly, pets it::

::waddles out of the docking bay, looking forward to 'reaquiring' lost goodies::

C-H-E-E-S-E.... ::*SIGH*::

Sleepy Time...

Thu, 20 Nov 2003 05:21:34 GMT

::lugs bucket of cheese to sleeping quarters, big grin on face, wearing freshly laundered blue tshirt which hangs below knees::

::clomps bucket onto the nightstand, peeling lid back, which falls on a slant beside the bucket::

*SNIIIIIIIFFFF!*

aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh...

C-H-E-E-S-E!

::climbs into bunk, reaching above head to remove nightcap from hook on wall::

::spreads elastic and clasps it around...forehead, sorta, then stretches cap over...ear canals and skull peaks, tucking in skin flaps at back of head::

::digs in nightstand drawer, pulls out red jar, peels back lid, pokes long finger into white goop and spreads liberally on...face...::

::rubs in, getting in all cracks and crevices::

::replaces lid, puts back in drawer, rubs left-over goop all over...hands...::

::fluffs pillow, grabs blanket and pulls over...feet...::

::balances bucket of cheese on...stomach...::

::gingerly, lovingly picks up a chunk, wafts it to...mouth...opens and plops in::

::chews::

aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh...

::swallows::

::burps::

e ee e ee e ee !!!!

::picks up another chunk, brings to mouth, plops in::

::chews::

aaaaaaaaahhhhhh...

::swallows::

::picks up a slice of cheese, tears in half, leans back, closes...eyes..., gets comfy::

::places each cheese slice half over closed...eyelids...::

::sighs::

::blindly feels around bucket for another chunk, picks it up, brings to mouth, plops in, chews, swallows::

::sighs, content::

Sigh.....::waddle::...sigh

Wed, 19 Nov 2003 03:12:56 GMT

::in cargo bay of the BvyiwPrt, in front of a crate::

::puts freshly laundered underwear on top, picks up blue tshirt::

::snaps out::

::fluffs::

::sniffs::

Ahhhh....ARCHER!!

::folds meticulously, meeting seam against seam, crisply tightening creases::

::places to side::

::smiles::

::picks up another blue tshirt::

::snaps out::

::fluffs::

::sniffs::

::folds meticulously, meeting seam against seam, crisply tightening creases::

::smiles::

::picks up blue brief::

::snaps out::

::fluffs, holds out::

::giggles::

::folds meticulously, meeting seam against seam, crisply tightening creases::

::picks up another tshirt::

...

Sitting on the Cargo Docking Bay...Wasting Time....

Mon, 17 Nov 2003 21:36:07 GMT

::hanging legs off the catwalk aboard the BvyiwPrt, swinging them back and forth in mid-air beneath, fiddling with blue cloth of Tshirt::

::hums::

drr--ddrrr-drr-drr--drr drr--drrr-ddrrr-dr

::ties a white string around one corner of folded hem, ties another string around another corner of folded hem; ties string around one sleeve end, ties another string around the other sleeve end::

::takes loose ends of strings and ties them one by one around empty wine bottle::

drr--ddrrr-drr-drr--drr drr--drrr-ddrrr-dr

::fluffs out shirt, spreading in hands and holding out over the emptiness below::

::smiles::

::lets go::

::light gravity wafts shirt gently downward like a parachute, dropping the bottle slowly, slowly, drifting diagonally away from catwalk::

::smiles bigger::

::lower, lower, lower...toward the floor and the...ship...sitting in the docking bay...::

::lower, almost there...::

*CLUNK* against the side of the Delta Flyer

::slips down to the ground::

::*SMILES BIG*::

::claps hands::

e ee e ee e ee e eee ee e ee e ee e e eeee ee !!!! !!! !!!

::licks lips, grabs another empty bottle and tshirt, takes string, ties around one corner of folded hem, ties another string around another corner of folded hem...::

Still Somewhere...Out There...

Sun, 16 Nov 2003 19:53:07 GMT

::orbiting a rather large-sized asteroid, waiting for energy surge to appear again::

::sitting at table at side of navigation room, watching screen and readouts once in a while::

Sigh...

::folds a piece of paper, small, smaller, smaller, smaller, small-er, sm-all-er...can't fold any more::

::puts head on top of arms, places folded paper smudge on table in front, sticks finger behind it::

*PING*

::paper goes flying across the room, into a corner with other pieces of folded paper::

::folds another piece of paper, small, smaller, smaller, smaller, small-er, sm-all-er...can't fold any more::

*PING*

::glances over at readout screens::

PAH... EZ83 P(8 3 ; 8y o2 13r[08sdku ;lQ8 1 R; O A:kuy Q23K BHAJ UIUIUIWBA Y1 ;;G G;;GG

::looks back at table::

::folds another piece of paper, small, smaller, smaller, smaller, small-er, sm-all-er...can't fold any more::

*PING*

::sigh::

Somewhere...Out There...

Sat, 15 Nov 2003 15:49:35 GMT

::toddles down the corridor of the BvyiwPrt, chewing on a piece of cheese::

::licks wozsd3's, wipes on blue tshirt is wearing, which hangs almost like a dress on body frame::

::zoops into navigation chair, blips on screen, checks settings and scans sector::

::reads strange energy buildups several thousand 30s8eUO3E's away::

ER?

::furrows...brow, or what would be a brow if had one::

::sets course to check it out, engages engine, which begins jump to warp, then sputters, flutters, and hesitates::

!!

SO%* 08E##3E F P)@$ O S;L ;S D[P9U 4SI}~! H3[;U YS E[0K JBAWE!!! !!!

::kicks console::

::kicks again::

::engines engage, smoothly this time, and the BvyiwPrt jumps to warp::

Somewhere between the ONeill and Enterprise...

Mon, 06 Oct 2003 20:06:37 GMT

::cloaked ship is flaming back to Enterprise::

C H E E S E....Archer...

!!! !!! !!!

::emits long-range communications sweep toward Enterprise::

!!! !!! !!!

eixij e3(*)!! 48|7 9D0KLW 8(@ OW38

!!! !!! !!!

::waits for Hoshi's ear to pick up signal::

qpij(&^2;98 burp*

Sat, 27 Sep 2003 04:18:02 GMT

::on the alien ship...::

p98yP2 IUW. iu2-b -8q\ waeri !!!

::takes another swig of wine::

as;ih 07 123P98FN...::slurring words:: wio'09uij%#...we oi [y76 r29 763la...!!!

::stands up, staggers to the control room door, stopping to shakily place a piece of cheese on a cracker::

::stares weepy-eyed at the morsel, squinting to see what it is eating::

s;oi09V)). ::lower lip quivers::

::pops it into mouth, chews lovingly, swallowing with a sigh::

af; kh98 7(8 74lhpus}|le... ::trails off::

::slams its woid8 p on the table::

s;ei3$?? eosi ARCHER!

::storms out into the corridor with half-empty wine bottle, slams the control panel near the lift. As the door opens it runs sideways into the wall::

Eeh? spw3e&.

::swivels around as the lift doors close. Stares blankly at the wall, muttering to itself::

::lift door opens, it winds its way in semi-sine wave curves down the hallway, arriving at the launch bay::

*BURP!*

::wipes szpoe across its wap8, trailing drool onto its qpzi3e::

::raises a cbhro on its szpoe, pointing to the ship and lurching forward::

co ue-@ ep8! sij 83#$TY sP:...so!

::sniffles::

::reaches the entry door, whips out a lock-pick device, unsteadily pokes it at the entry panel::

*POKE*

::misses::

::sticks its tuox[ sideways from its cbhro in concentration, peering one-eyed at its target::

*POKE*

::misses again::

QWRAAA!

*POKE*

::hits it this time, door to Flyer hisses open::

::almost trips inside, curses again::

::tumbles over to the pilot's seat, sits, fiddles, door closes, engines fire up, opens launch bay doors and goes to warp::

::POOF!::

wpu e8j(&;KLiwe[ Enterprise oip y986;

Thu, 25 Sep 2003 03:53:11 GMT

::ECLW 7)tU2 eeee LH9j9k ugkjaeoi88 3s siu33::

~~fuw p83 isoi3d98y3 q0888**6%%%~~

Archer. iiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

Ielknicue ei8IJN

Mon, 22 Sep 2003 05:13:56 GMT

eoxie 234divijIDLIe jsoiiE kcu384C,iiiiiI.

Eio vcsleje9&&03.

woei %*L& EHbeidjh7 Archer EI02034##6.

8t8t8t8t.